Sunday 31 January 2010

I want...

I want to see what is really there.
Behind your eyes, behind your words.

Deep down there, I know that I like you.
Whatever happens, I'll be there for you.

But please give me a moment of truth.
I want to know the truth.
I want to know that you are true.
I...I want to know if everything about you is true.
Everything...every memory, everything you gave me...

Wednesday 27 January 2010

She doesn't know anything.

She wants me to change myself.
And I wonder how, how I'm gonna change myself.
I've been myself for almost 18 years.
And she expects me to change myself so suddenly, so quickly.
How can I change?
Should I be who she wants me to be?
I don't say, "you need to change beause I don't like the way you are."
I don't say, "you shouldn't be like this because other people won't like it."

Why should I care what other people's wants!!?
Can't you just accept me as who I am?
You guys say that I changed.
But don't you think, when I was just the same, you guys changed?

Can't you guys just accept me as who I am?
whether I complain a lot,
whether I act childish sometimes,
whether I do somthing stupid at times...
because that's how I am, how I cope wih my life.

Because everyone is not perfect.

Tuesday 26 January 2010

Difference.

We are different.
We think differently.
We act differently.
We have different opinions.
We came from a different world.

We are not the same. We are just different.
Because everything happened to us is all diffrent.
So, why should we be the same?
Why should we act in the same way?
Why should we think in the same way?
Why should we follow the same rules?
Why should we be the same?

We are all different.
Then why do you make rules about what I can be and can't be?
I wonder why I need to be what you want me to be.

I wonder.

Thursday 21 January 2010

I don't know why!

Today, ok, I tried to control my anger.
I even prepared a notebook to write down every single reason why I was angry.
But everything went blank after hearing something stupidly, crazily absurd.
That there's a possibility that she cares about me.
Yeah right. why suddenly would she be like this?
I didn't want to think about it, but I did, and I lost my focus on my study again.
Totally distracted by something that I should never be distracted by.
And my mind, full of anger, sadness, aggressive thoughts, just won't stop
making me become depressed, helplessly angry.
.
.
.
Am I ruined already...?

Wednesday 20 January 2010

My life sucks now.

WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT IT'S SO NOT EASY?!
IT'S DAMN DIFFICULT!!!
TO PRETEND THAT I'M HAPPY!
TO FAKE A SMILE, A LAUGH!
TO BECOME ENJOYABLE TO YOU!

HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE THIS!
I ACTUALLY THOUGHT OF SUICIDE!
BUT I DON'T WANT TO DIE LIKE THIS!

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THEN?!
WHAT AM I SUPPOED TO DO?
I'M ALREADY MAD AT MYSELF,
AND NOW YOU GUYS HATE ME FOR BEING LIKE THIS?
WHAT! WHAT!! WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!!!......(T_T)

PLEASE, ANYONE OUT THERE?
CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME TO FIND THE SOLUTION?
BEFORE I DO SOMETHING STUPID TO MYSELF AGAIN?
PLEASE!

Tuesday 19 January 2010

Re-start: Facts about me XD

Ahh, I just erased everything I've written before. I just wanted to start all over again. So, here I am, writing a new post. This time, I will post about me. Hmm, like a "Facts about me". I just wanna introduce myself simply. Here we go then.

Name: Kim Ah Reum (김아름)
Birthdate: June 24, 1992
Blood Type: (RH+) B
Zodiac Sign: Cancer
Hometown: Yong-In, South Korea (though I was born in Seoul)
Siblings: 1 younger brother (Kim Seung Hyun, 김승현)

Favorite
Colour: Purple and Yellow
Number: 2
Movies: Avatar, Harry Potter, Twilight, The Sound Of Music, etc...
Songs: So many that I can't list down!
Subjects: English, Korean, Social Studies, Earth Science, Music
Actor/Actress: Michelle Rodriguez, Emma Watson, Daniel Radcliffe

Ah, well, I need to study. I forget that I have a test tomorrow. XD walaoeh.
So, I guess this is the end for today. Hmmm...So, bye. :D and see ya soon!